The Web Designer Declaration of Independence
The Preamble
When in the course of online events it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the browser based bands which have connected them to the internet and to assume among the powers of the interwebs, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Common Sense and of World Wide Web Consortium entitle them, a decent respect to the standards of web design requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that creativity exists in all designers, and they are endowed by Common Sense and the W3C certain rights, that among those are Web Standards, Sanity, and Creative License. When these rights comes under fire by any establishment it is the right of web community to address them and, if necessary, act upon them. Such evils can no longer be overlooked and the suffering can no longer be tolerated.
We hereby put forth out list of grievances to a candid world, claiming independence from each the following plagues of the internet in hopes that our boycotting shall lead to the reform of each.
Grievances
- Myspace, which has empowered people everywhere to bring back the Geocities days of tiled backgrounds and animated GIFs. And sparkle text… so much sparkle text.
- The Internet Marketer, their presence on Twitter, and their continued vague solicitations to “Market your internet”.
- The pixel pusher client, because that one art class you took in college does not qualify you to “make the design better” by shifting everything 2 pixels to the left.
- The family friend that gives you the “honor” of doing a free website for them. (Just wait, it will be the iTunes and Facebook killer – all in one).
- Internet Explorer and everything it stands for.
- Web 2.0 graphics, in all their high gloss, beveled, gradient covered, badge-y glory.
- The use of meaningless stock photography, because a person and three of their coworkers are never that excited about what’s happening on a computer monitor. Stop pointing at it.
- Tables used to layout an entire website with no tabular data. CSS was invented for a reason, quit using a candle when you have a lightbulb.
- “Dime a dozen” companies that “optimize SEO, innovate solutions, accessibility your HTML, scalability your Photoshop, and buzzword your buzzword. Oh yeah…unsurpassed quality too.”
- Comic Sans.
And with our complaints clearly on on display, we hereby wish to severe our connections from the aforementioned articles in order to achieve a more perfect internet. We choose instead to be guided by common sense and the W3C in hopes to lead a more prosperous and creative existence. No longer will we be limited by headaches from browser specific stylesheets or online experts whose experience is limited to Facebook. With this we dissolve all bonds to the above items of complaint and now look to each other, fellow designers, for sanity, inspiration, and continued creativity.
Internet Patriots, Heed My Words!
Do you have a fire brewing within? Does a part of the web community cause you substantial unrest? Slap your John Hancock below and practice your freedom of speech.
(PS. Also, on a thrilling side note – this is the 100th post on Build Internet!)
Discussion
July 3rd, 2009 at 9:46 PM
Classic. I thought it was going to be a bit lame, but never suspected jewels like the stock photography clause. Genuinely laughed out loud.
Well done!
July 3rd, 2009 at 11:23 PM
Great declaration, I also laughed out loud. I love that it simply ended “Comic Sans.” No other commentary was needed, so funny.
.-= Kayla´s last blog ..Create a Portfolio Client Area Using PHP and MySQL: Part 1 =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 4:11 AM
Awesome – light hearted but so true!!
.-= MorayWeb´s last blog ..Introducing Our E-Commerce Platform Of Choice – Magento =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 11:16 AM
As a former history major turned designer, I found this to be very clever. Well done.
July 4th, 2009 at 11:21 AM
Great post! Not even just the family friend though, but the client that wants to give you the “honor” of being a partner in the website if you do it for free.
.-= Vernon´s last blog ..Create A Scrolling Background Effect Like YouLove.us =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 12:48 PM
I agree with the most of the points except, I don’t see how does Comic sans makes our job harder. Nor how does MySpace’s (even Twitter) tiled bg affects us :)
The one that really had an impact on me is the everything-under-the-sun-for-the-web type companies that do SEO, Graphics, Programming this and that.. and so on. But nothing so properly.
July 4th, 2009 at 1:28 PM
And I thought that I was the only one that was getting sick and tired of the glossy web 2.0 stuff. I love textures like your blue texture background on here. Great list. I hate IE also…and all that it stands for!
.-= Nicholas Z. Cardot´s last blog ..Independence Day – 233 Years of Freedom =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 2:45 PM
Still so much ignorance around web design, and I can’t see it changing anytime soon! Great post.
July 4th, 2009 at 3:38 PM
Excellent post, covered many truths. IE, mySpace, tables and everything else. It should be told to everyone.
July 4th, 2009 at 3:40 PM
very cool.
July 4th, 2009 at 3:59 PM
excellent post!
typo alert – near the end, “severe” should be “sever”
July 4th, 2009 at 4:11 PM
IE makes me cry :_(
July 4th, 2009 at 4:15 PM
HAHAHAHAHahahahaha :)
.-= Trozdol´s last blog ..Update =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 4:34 PM
/signed,
I agree to the declaration of independence
July 4th, 2009 at 4:41 PM
HAHHA
brilliant … very witty .. n so sensible .. as if i could relate to each line n say … EXACTLY …
July 4th, 2009 at 4:52 PM
Great post! We laughed, so funny and so sadly true. I passed along to the meetup coordinator for our local creatives group. One more particular grievance: the clients who wish to argue price after contracts are signed before work is finished, and how they can “help the price” by “helping”. Truly great post!
July 4th, 2009 at 5:17 PM
I’m new around here, so I might be a little behind….IE stands for something?
July 4th, 2009 at 5:51 PM
IE = Internet Exploder = Internet Explorer browser. Yes, I too hate it. Why do so many people love it still?
July 4th, 2009 at 6:54 PM
Nothing wrong with Comic Sans. I use it as my default text on my IM clients. A whole site shouldn’t be written in it though. There are a lot more annoying things than Comic Sans.
.-= Eddie Monge´s last blog ..Scrolling Area Adjustment for Touchpads Using Ubuntu > 8.10 =-.
July 4th, 2009 at 8:30 PM
Yep I agree with IE comment…..! I haven’t used it for over 3 years now. The way I’m talking about quitting you would have thought I gave up smoking, drinking or drugs but believe me until I found FireFox I really was none the wiser!
July 4th, 2009 at 9:59 PM
rofl
July 4th, 2009 at 11:46 PM
Isn’t it true that IE makes all the designer wise as they are fixing pixels perfect ;)
.-= Shahriat Hossain´s last blog ..Some common osCommerce errors and their fixing =-.
July 5th, 2009 at 12:45 AM
There must be a way to present these great! articles to clients before going into projects : )
heheh, could make life easier for all.
CooooL Post.
July 5th, 2009 at 1:34 AM
Had a good laugh reading this especially the ending bit where you just simply go Comic Sans. ROTFL!
July 5th, 2009 at 5:56 AM
Haha! Nice post. My favourite is #4. Had really bad experiences. It started with ‘need-simple-help-with-static-pages’ and ended up as a social network site.
.-= praveen´s last blog ..uhuroo – content collaboration made easy =-.
July 5th, 2009 at 9:19 AM
You have listed the grievances in a candid way. Hata off to you.
July 5th, 2009 at 9:26 AM
Classic… simply classic… lol
July 6th, 2009 at 3:26 AM
Well the author has pointed some truths, but there are more disturbing problems than IE6,7,8…and the future ones :)
When you choose your profession you have to be fully understanding all of it’s pros and cons, not to cry about them every time.
It was fun thou to read something that I’ve thought to write once :)
July 6th, 2009 at 4:58 AM
Big LOL at everything ;)
July 6th, 2009 at 6:31 AM
I like the list, but I’d add another grievence.. and unfortunately one the article used in the first sentence!
“Interwebs”. Please.. no. There’s no excuse in 2009 to use this awful word.
July 6th, 2009 at 3:15 PM
Excellent.
July 6th, 2009 at 4:57 PM
You missed a spot: there’s nothing there about HTML email:
“Why does my email blast look terrible in Eudora on the Mac”?
July 6th, 2009 at 8:09 PM
Awesome! Ha! I did something similar with the Gettysburg Address for my HS graduation ceremony. So I am totally loving this on more then one level! Hawtdiggity!
This would make a cool poster. ^.^
.-= Hope Bryant´s last blog ..The Power of Need… =-.
July 7th, 2009 at 6:46 PM
Haha nice! I strongly agree.. especially the stock photography, Comic Sans, and Internet Explorer.
Win!
Also: inline markup and stylesheets which aren’t separated from the markup.
.-= Kim H´s last blog ..June 2009 Theme =-.
July 7th, 2009 at 8:54 PM
This is absolutely spot on and hilarious. I’m going to tweet this now.
.-= Trisha Cupra´s last blog ..Are Your Headings heading for Disaster? =-.
July 8th, 2009 at 8:44 AM
LOL, I hate IE so much…
.-= Sayz´s last blog ..9 Must Read Tips Before Building CSS Sheet =-.
July 8th, 2009 at 1:56 PM
We’ve needed this for so long! Signed, and blogged!
http://chetgassett.com/2009/web-declaration
.-= ChetG´s last blog ..Web Designer Declaration of Independence =-.
July 11th, 2009 at 7:53 PM
Love the comment about the stock photography and pointing at the monitor – I used to think that was a W3 standard. ROFL
.-= Ollie´s last blog ..Cheshire Industrial Doors =-.
August 28th, 2009 at 2:36 PM
Here, here! Very well put. But what about:
11. Front-page sites
:)
.-= Kyle Simpson´s last blog ..getify: "The Constitution is not an instrument for the gov’t to restrain the people, [but] for the people to restrain the gov’t…" –Patrick Henry =-.
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